Who Am I?

I'm Kind of thinking that I better head to bed soon as I will need to be up at  for dad coming up to visit.  I sit with my BIG headphones on listening to music and pondering what I can include in this entry which will undoubtedly be the last of the night.  I think I made some progress today but in what I don't know.  Realising I do deserve to be happy? That some people are interested in my opinions and what I have to say?  That I am a strong resilient woman or that I an do things when I put my mind to it because to me doing this blog is a HUGE commitment it's scary and I'm not going to want to do it all the time but I need to for myself as well as others.

As creative as I am or sometimes wish I was because that's who I feel like on the inside.  Writing doesn't come easy to me.  I wish it did because I could be an author which work be awesome.  I have loads of ideas for books in my head but don't know how to put the words down that's why I couldn't keep a full diary before and why I was a crap pen pal.  People ask me so what's being happening and my reply is nothing much I would love to be one of those people who could turn little mundane daily things into an epic tale of adventure.  Thinking tomorrow I may also start a favourite song lyric blog as well because I need somewhere to put them

So when do I start believing in myself.  When will I believe I'm OK at writing I don't think I'll ever be exceptional some people's stuff you read just flows has the right words in the right places, what are mine - demented ramblings of a crazy person.  Why don't I go for thing in life - because I don't see the point in wasting the precious time I have on things that there is a million people better at it than me, so I would never get a second look.  I am OK at some things, I can't think of anything I'm particularly good at and there is nothing I am exceptional at.  I am quite smart and the one good thing I had that was good was my memory but now it is going too.  My long term memory is still rather good but I fear what will happen if I start losing that to.  My memories (however bad they may be) and being able to remember is what makes me who I am.  Without them who am I?  Am I nobody?

Again Good Night and thanks for listening x